December 3rd: International Day of Persons with Disabilities
Why does this day mean something to me you might ask? Why should someone celebrate such a day?
Well let me share with you!
Being a person with a physical disability and struggles sometimes invisible to the eye has been a lot to deal with. Perceptions in society about people with disabilities are not always the best. Some say you are too young, some say you will never get that dream job, some say you probably won’t finish school, and some just say your life will never be the same.
This is not the case. An individual with a disability can live the life they always wanted, they are successful, and they achieve their dreams and goals. Sure sometimes you have to adjust but you have one life to make the most of your life.
One thing that I struggled with the most when dealing with my knee and recovering from my flare up was that I always assumed that people saw only my knee or only my disability that nobody knew who I was. I started to identify as the cripple, I didn’t know who I was without my disability. I didn’t know what people were thinking of me without my disability. I wondered if they would think of me the same way if I wasn’t disabled. This put a lot of stress on myself. I remember trying to live the normal university life and going to to the bar with my friends on crutches and guys using my knee as an ice breaker/pick up line. This turned me off and I would usually crutch away but I wondered if they saw anything else. I would wear low cut shirts to see if they would look up a little more instead of at me knee.
I remember mall walking with my friend during our breaks at school and having people walk up to me, some even from across the hall just to say things like “ouch” or “im so sorry” These phrases drove me up the wall. First “ouch” is not the appropriate thing to say to someone who is living in pain. We know it hurts we don’t need the reminder even if its just from you, because let me tell you there was probably six others who said the same thing. Second “I’m so sorry” this phrase still to this day drives me bonkers. What are you sorry for? I get it its human instinct to tell someone they are sorry there life is not “normal” but what is normal? Also there is nothing you can do to change it and you did nothing to cause it so please don’t feel sorry for me.
As a person with a disability I pride myself in accomplishments. Walking across the stage to receive my first diploma in 1/2 inch heels was one highlight I will never forget. Although my knee was taped into place so I didn’t have to wear my knee brace I felt free for a couple of hours. Seeing as I was having knee surgery 12 days later it did not really matter what happened that day except that I feel like I had accomplished something huge.
University was a struggle, as I was on crutches, a wheel chair or a cane the majority of the time. The campus was not accessible, I was a Kinesiology student, most classes were not accessible. I spent a lot of time on the sidelines, but I will never forget the classes I was included in, wheelchair basketball, adapted baseball, and a swimming class! University was tough I wrote exams on my lap, high on pain medication, and in seriously uncomfortable posisitions. I studied and did homework at the fracture clinic, in between naps from all the medication. I am not saying I didn’t want to drop out. I did want to drop out a number of times. I would not be where I am today without the help of my amazing professors and the class of 2014!
Without my experience, I would not have a new found appreciation for accessibility and advocacy for accessibility. I would not have thought up and designed my fourth year thesis and I would not be the person I am today. University helped me fight!
Finishing college in the hospital taught me that anything really is possible if you want it bad enough. I did not want to waste an entire year of my life because in the last month I was stuck in a hopsital. I finished every assignment that needed to be done without using the extensions that were given. I struggled to write with one hand before finding Dragon naturally speaking, nurses helped to finish writing and make sure things made sense it was a group effort but I was proud to say I did it!
Putting my pride aside and going back to Lakehead after my experience at the hopsital was tough. Having to take a program for a year just to determine if your limitations would allow you to proceed with attempting to find a career in Kinesiology was a scary thought. After our first practical weekend I cried my body was so tired I just wasn’t sure. The second, third and fourth though went much better with less tears.
Life keeps going no matter the struggles you are faced. Just learn to find your fight and success awaits.
Society will put a number of barriers up in front of you just be willing to knock them down one at a time. We live in a world where anything away from the normal is not okay and that we should feel sorry or bow out and just get to this finish line but this is not okay! No matter who you are this is your life and only your life! Nobody can tell you what to do or how to do it. Sure the road may be tougher than others but the joy of getting everything in life you have ever wanted will be worth it I promise!
Do you! Be you! Keep putting one foot in front of the other and get out there!
And for those who are still reading I leave you with one thought. Everybody is dealing with things, some deal with physical issues that we can see them dealing with, others deal with invisible issues that we cannot see. Please do not judge someone but the cover of the book. We all deal with things differently and have hills to climb ourselves without the added hill of someone’s judgment.
So once again Happy International day of Person’s with Disabilities!!!